What’s gone forever

The boy-child and his grandfather, January 1999. Photo: Su Leslie

The boy-child and his grandfather, January 1999. Photo: Su Leslie

Today is my parents’ in law’s 54th wedding anniversary. Both are unwell and may not even be aware that today is a special day for them.

Though not particularly hands-on grandparents, they have nevertheless been part of the boy-child’s day to day life since we returned to NZ from the UK when he was a toddler.

For the first few years, my in-laws generously let us take over their house and garden for the boy-child’s birthday parties. After that came many years of family birthday dinners – followed, in the last few years, by somewhat fleeting visits to share some cake, and deliver a card and cash.

But no more. A fall last April changed my father-in-law’s life forever, and with that, the lives of everyone in the family. Taken-for-granted traditions and rituals no longer make sense, and come the boy-child’s sixteenth birthday in a few days, we will be trying to find new ways to be a family.

I’m counting down to my son’s sixteenth birthday. Here is what has gone before:

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/24/shining-through/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/23/five-days-to-go-heres-where-it-all-gets-manic/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/22/six-word-saturday-2-oh-oh-sweet-child-of-mine/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/20/funny-friday-the-things-kids-say/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/19/down-memory-lane/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/18/wordless-wednesday-babies-love-books/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/17/shoe-down-the-river-stories-and-other-backwaters-of-family-history/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/16/what-sort-of-star-are-you/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/16/song-for-sunday-the-boy-childs-early-taste-in-music/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/15/happy-valentines-day/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/13/yellow-is-the-colour-of-happiness/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/11/wordless-wednesday-bright-eyes/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/10/10-things-tuesday-hes-ready-to-leave-home-when/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/09/on-writing-wishes-and-not-re-inventing-the-wheel/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/08/six-word-saturday-who-said-boys-cant-wear-pink/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/07/when-two-heads-are-so-much-better-than-one/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/06/family-photo-friday-kids-no-more/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/05/three-weeks-out-and-ive-organised-nothing/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/04/on-the-importance-of-grandparents/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/03/on-counting-and-gender-stereotypes/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/02/getting-over-the-grumps/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/02/01/weekly-photo-challenge-object/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/01/31/six-word-saturday-on-being-allowed-a-weekend-sleep-in/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/01/30/on-raising-children-and-not-getting-enough-sleep/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/01/29/back-to-school-for-the-last-time/

https://zimmerbitch.wordpress.com/2014/01/28/wordless-wednesday-remembering-birthdays-past-and-counting-down-to-a-big-one/

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