On anniversaries and growing older together

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It’s 29 years since the Big T and I first got together. In the absence of an actual marriage, August 1st — the date of our first, er, date — stands as our anniversary.

tony and su eng ball

University of Auckland, Engineering Ball. A few years ago! Photo: Gray-Leslie family archive.

Like most couples there have been times we’ve struggled to see a future together — and other times when (I can only really speak for myself here) I couldn’t imagine a life without him.

On holiday. Russell, Bay of Islands, NZ. Photo: Gray-Leslie family archive.

On holiday. Russell, Bay of Islands, NZ. Photo by the boy-child. Gray-Leslie family archive.

He’s seen me at my worst (about an hour before a particularly tricky university assignment was due and about 30 minutes before our son was born) — and at my best (actually getting the degree, and the first few hours after our son’s birth). He’s managed to cope with both.

Capping day, Victoria University of Wellington. Finally completed the mid-life crisis degree. Photo: the boy-child. Gray-Leslie family archive.

Capping day, Victoria University of Wellington. Finally completed the mid-life crisis degree. Photo: the boy-child. Gray-Leslie family archive.

We’ve navigated aging, familiarity, family dramas, career changes, a couple of major emigrations, health problems, house renovation, and raising the coolest, funniest, cleverest most gorgeous 17 year old in the world — and we’re still talking to each other.

We must be doing something right.

Even after all these years; still finding something to smile about. Photo by the boy-child. Gray-Leslie family archive.

Even after all these years; still finding something to smile about. Photo by the boy-child. Gray-Leslie family archive.

Apologies for re-posting some of these images; they are too much a part of our story not to show.

 

 

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30 thoughts on “On anniversaries and growing older together

    • Thanks Hannah. I missed your posts last week/weekend, so I didn’t realise you’d had such a rough time. I hope you are feeling a bit better today. I was thinking of you yesterday as we were exploring a new (to us) part of the country. We had Purcell’s ‘The Fairy Queen’ on the car stereo and were in the middle of a windy dirt road in the forest; suddenly the ocean came into view. It made me think how quickly good things can happen when we need them. All my best wishes to you. I especially hope your feet are healing. 🙂

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      • Thanks so much, Su. I missed most of your posts last week also because I was feeling too ill to do much of anything. I’m catching up on them now. I haven’t listened to the full Fairie Queen of Purcell’s in along time; I should put the cd in the player and listen! I am slowly feeling better. So far, a little each day. That windy dirt road and the sudden view of the ocean sounds wonderful! The Lord of the Rings movies did a lot to show me how beautiful NZ is. Wish it could be on my list of countries I could visit, but alas, the flight time would be prohibitive for my immune system, I think. btw, are all of your photos taken with your iPhone? I’m wondering especially about your stunning macro shots. This is something of a disjointed reply………

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    • Thanks Janet. I think it’s important to remember the milestones. They give us something to hold on to when things are a bit rough, as well as being a great excuse for a celebration 🙂

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  1. Himself and I just celebrated 20 years married… we too are still talking to each other (and loving each other too) so we must be doing something right too 🙂

    Congratulations to you both! (30 is our next big milestone, looking forward to it!)

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    • Thanks — and congratulations. In the last couple of years we’ve seen several friends’ marriages end, and it tends to cloud the fact that actually, most couples we know have stayed together, and are happy and loving. My in-laws just clocked up 54 years, and my great-grandparents were married for 67 years — until my great grandfather’s death.

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  2. WHat a gorgeous set of photos! Congratulations and best wishes for many more happy years to you both. We’ve clocked up 35 years together which seems, simultaneously, no time at all and forever. I hope there’s many more in store for us too.

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  3. Thanks so much for letting us all get a glimpse of the life behind the blogger! I loved it. You have a strong bond which is clear to see and it made me feel happy to see that. Love that your hair won’t give up on the Punk phase you went through. I like its attitude. Wishing you both many, many more years together.

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    • Thank you so much Karen. 🙂 Yes, the punk hair is so much a part of me I’m thinking I should lose a bit of weight so I’ll look better cutting it short and spiky again.

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